Tuesday, October 07, 2003


what's meg white doing in this film?

This post will probably seem rather old but after watching the previews for Scary Movie 3, it occured to me that I still have beef with The Ring, which gets richly lampooned in SM3.

I never saw Ringu, the original Japanese version, but I'm told the US version patterns the J original where it counts. My beef with both versions is that they blow the most terrifying scene in the movie: where psycho girl pops out of the well and walks out of the TV set. I've always been one to find terror in the abstract - more symbolism than physical reality. I mean, it's one thing to find some axe-wielding killer scary - sure, if I was in the cabin in the woods and some backwater, inbred hick with a chainsaw popped up, I'd be scared. But to me, terror that lacks a physical body yet still manifests its presence - THAT sh*t will keep you up at nights.

Folks may have found The Blair Witch Project pretentious (and let's face it, it kind of was) but I like the fact that you actually never see anything "real" in it. Yet your mind constructs what you don't really see and your imagination is usually going to be far more effective than a filmmaker armed with a make-up crew. That's why, in The Exorcist, what I found spooky was how Pazuzu (the devil) manifested his image throughout the house. Linda Blair puking up pea soup and masturbating with a crucifix seemed almost comical in comparison.

Back to The Ring - watching evil Alanis climb out of the well was chilling, especially as she walked forward to the camera. But when she climbs OUT of the television set, it was corny. I mean, what is this, an A-Ha video?