THE BLOG IS BACK, PART 2

loogies can kill

Yeah, so like...being away for 10 days: I don't even want to think about the mail I have to sort through though thankfully, having internet access in Shanghai meant that I didn't have 1,000 pieces of spam email waiting for me. On the other hand, Bloglines tells me I have at least 340+ blog updates waiting to be waded through.

What I've learned in the process is a reminder that the online community does an amazing job of staying on top of both important, pertinent social issues as well as providing entertaining and enlightening criticsm/anecdotes. Making my way through all this is a labor but you gotta love it. Let's begin:

J. Hopper on SXSW. Sometimes, you read stuff and it makes you giddy like sunshine. A few extra carat sparkles among the gems:

-"Networking in the ladies room with women who have been drinking for 9 hours, their under-face muscles slack like maternity sweatpants."
-"It's not possible to say "Murder Dog" without laughing. "
-"We missed the Record Collection showcase where there was a 5 foot tall (?) erection pinata, and Har Mar Sean beat someone about the head with a microphone, after the dude hit him really hard with the cock-pinata and then refused to play anymore because the dude had ruined the party vibe."

We're not worthy. But can I just say that after Pete Rock flaked out on a gig in S.F. where I was supposed to open for him, reading this almost makes me like him again:

"We stumbled upon Pete Rock spinning at 4 am in a Mexican resturant, going all VH1 Storytellers style, monologue between cuts "I made this.... when I was a younger, happier man, when I was 23.... when I was... a different man.... YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE?! ( pleading, serious) When the whole world is telling you ... "you are the greatest"? You know what kind of fucking... weight that is to carry around?!" and then would throw the fader over to some track that I barely knew but was so so fresh, so from 1988 with love. he did this between every song, would stop songs early, discussed the death of his father, Jam Master J, apologized for being drunk, talking about stealing from his mom at age 10 to buy albums, and I think verged on tears. Every song he played was one of his, and it was genius. He did this in front of me, Julianne, Partymanica and 11 other headz and the people working the bar."

And one more J-Ho-ism, just because she's cool like that. Hopper on the new N.E.R.D. album: "It's like Joe Jackson without any gayness, or sex, or hooks. It's like mimes on a bike, waving." Please Hopper, don't hurt 'em!

My bro over at Angry Asian Man is a non-stop roll these days. His worthwhile postings are too extensive to summarize but here are five highlights:

1) MSNBC looks at issues arising from transracial Chinese adoption by white, American parents. You think this topic is big now? Wait 10 years, when a lot of these kids come of age. Hell, even Sex and the City alluded to Chinese adoption. Very vogue, no doubt, but if the experiences of Korean adoptees (who are a generation ahead of the Chinese) are any indication, the kind of social issues to be raised by these children becoming adults will be sizable (not all negative certainly but definitely interesting).
2) Chud.com details several Asian cinema cult hits being remade for American audiences. Yes folks, The Ring is only the beginning.
3) Blender comes with an unexpectedly thorough story about the Chinatown shooting that involved Chinese American rapper Jin. I reported on this months ago but no one seemed to follow up and all of the sudden, Blender comes through with a comprehensive story about it. Kudos.
4) 2000 Census data on gay/lesbian APIs come out.
5) And oh yeah, a host of stuff about the Details Magazine, "Gay or Asian?" debacle.

Air America Radio, the first liberal talk-show network kicks off today at noon. Surprisingly, no San Franicsco station currently carries it. In NY however, there is some controversy since the station that's hosting Air America, WLIB, has been a historically African American community station and it's being displaced to make room for a largely white staff. Hmm...is that progress per se? Read what J-Smooth has to say about that.
(noted at Best Week Ever)

Speaking of Hiphopmusic.com's J-Smooth, he's been consistently excellent with his news and commentary. Among his highlights:

1) Ghostface vs. Email Spam: who comes with the iller slanguistics?
2) NY's Power 105 DJ Raqiyah Mays fired for sparking off about interracial Black/White relationships.
3) Chuck D. on Kanye West.

Lowculture.com lampoons Scooby Doo 2. Ouchie!

Hua pointed this out to me: the new album cover for Dead Prez's Revolutionary But Gangsta is pretty hot:

Slate has an online journal about Girls Gone Wild. It's like watching a car crash - you shouldn't look but it's hard not to.

Joey Pinkey over at Intellectual Hip-Hop Commentary has been posting up a series of entries about hip-hop in Asia, all worth reading:

1) Starts here with a post about Def Jam Japan.
2) Then more on blackface in Asia.
3) Even more on hip-hop in Japan

THE BLOG IS BACK, PART 1

protect ya neck

The bizatch of being bizack from a long(ish) vacation is simply readjusting to a normal routine. Don't get me wrong - I LIKE being away from home and not worrying about shit like 1) my dissertation, 2) writing deadlines, 3) the price of gas in S.F., 4) Passion of the Christ, etc. But especially when you write about music, 10 days might as well be like 10 weeks. Like...what's the "Fallen" remix? Who are the Federation and what's "Hyphy"? Why do I keep hearing about Nellie McKay even though I have yet to actually hear Nellie McKay? People are doing mega-mixes of songs over ring tone beats? Holy christ, now I know what Rip Van Winkle felt like (better him than Robert Van Winkle)

S and I were in Shanghai until Sunday (and due to a family emergency, I still haven't even gotten back to my own apartment yet, but instead, had to fly to LA ASAP where I am currently enjoying the beauty of jet lag. I've seen two sunrises in a row and believe me, that never happens). I still haven't even remotely gotten around to piecing my thoughts together to create another travelogue but I wanted to share one story before I totally forget it. This paraphrased anecdote comes from my man Mike, formerly of NYC/TurntableLab.com and Staple Design's Reed Space, now teaching English in Shanghai:

I was mentioning to Mike that I needed a haircut badly and like me, he also wears his coiffe razor short. He laughed and said, "around here, if you a shaved head, people either think you're A) a monk or B) an ex-con, freshly released from prison. I got into a cab with a friend of mine and the cabbie asked my friend if I had just gotten out of jail." Apparently, the baldie phenom has not yet swept China. Maybe if Yao Ming starts rocking a chrome dome like MJ, it will start a new trend 'round these parts.

---

Back at home...in one of those weird time-machine-like experiences that can only come with int'l travel, S and I flew out of Shanghai at about 10:30am on Sunday and landed at SFO at about 8:30am on Sunday. Yeah, we GAINED two hours and managed to go from morning, through midnight, and back to morning whilst crossing the Pacific. Alas, after managing to take much needed five hour nap, I woke up to my cell phone buzzing, with my sister on the other line, telling me that my 94 year old grandfather in LA had just suffered a massive aneurysm. Within two hours, I was back on a plane, this time to LA where me and my sister were the only family members around until my dad (China), his sister (south Jersey) and brother (Maine) could fly in the next day.

At some point, I'll have much more to say about all this, but between being dog tired and suffering from diminished mental capacities on account of the dog-tiredness, it's hard to be articulate or insightful. Just to put it out there - I'm doing ok with all this. My grandfather had a very long and healthy life and in comparison to my two grandmothers, one of whom died from a long, hard bout with cancer, the other who was felled by a stroke before passing away a year or two later, my grandfather suffered relatively little before easing into his current coma. From what my sister told me, he's actually been in great spirits of late and that actually makes me feel better knowing that.

One more thing for now. This is the first time I've seen my dad and his siblings together, in a single room, in years...I can't even remember the last time actually. My uncle is like a shorter, skinnier version of my dad - I mean, they're brothers, they're meant to look alike but it's just kind of uncanny, especially since I never see my uncle. Anyways, this was the conversation within the first 10 minutes. 1) My dad brought everyone up to speed on my grandfather's condition (suffice to say, it's worst-case scenario), 2) my aunt voiced her concerns that my grandfather's housekeeper may have been stealing money from him and 3) the three of them began to compare how they got tickets to come out (aunt=frequent flier mileage, uncle=Priceline.com, dad=paying United through the nose). I wouldn't call the conversation surreal but it was kind of funny seeing them go from grief, to anger, to comparison shopping.

EVERYONE LOVES A CHINA BOY

ready for take-off

Pop Life is on vacation in Shanghai from the 19th all the way until the 28th! Look for semi-daily updates from the Motherland starting on Monday. For background, you can read the travelogue for my last trip to Shanghai, back during Christmas of 2002.

Pop Life returns to its regularly scheduled programming after the 28th.

GOES TO 11
UPDATED 3/18

who's world is this?

How to rob a Girl Scout. Remember my story below about Girl Scout cookies? Well, evidently, gully MFers read that too because Girl Scouts are getting held up in Berkeley. Damn.
(spotted at Aye Train)

Digital cameras. I love how newer digital cameras are going retro style. Peep this new Epson - the first digital camera with a range finder.

(spotted at gizmodo)

Time killers. Uh oh, more Flash-powered musical toys to keep you unproductive at work/school/home, etc. Fun as hell though.

Back to Idol: Read why Funkdigital.com's Metal Face hates the show.

---

Some American Idol stuff: I said this before and I'll say it again - why is Matthew Rogers still in this? Dude is WACK. He's a totally uninspired singer and acts like a yahoo. I suspect he'll survive further along just because he's a white guy. It's like affirmative action for honkies up in this competition. That explains why carrot-top, John Stevens is still in this running as well. His voice was flatter than his ass, trying to sing Stevie Wonder's "Lately," as if it was a Rat Pack song. Whatever - shit is wack. A blind man could see it.

Call me a bastard but I'm also totally not feeling George Huff. I agree, he's a totally affable guy but his voice is so thin, I could shave with it. On the other hand, Jasmine...girl is off the chains and I'm not just saying that out of ethnocentric love. I don't really see her as a pop star, but I love listening to her do her thing. Feel that.

That all said, you know LaToya has this shit on lock.

I know my man Jeff has the best of intentions but J, Camille is kind of weak sauce. Just because you sound like Lauryn doesn't mean you actually sound like Lauryn, yaoming? And while I don't think Jennifer Hudson oversang, I didn't think she could necessarily sing either. Her voice is better, as Jeff notes, in her inflections but as a sonic quality, I was like, eh. Don't compare her to Aretha. Don't compare none of these women to Aretha. There is no Queen but the Queen.

Surreal follow-up to a tragic story. "'Suicide' Beau Tells of Plan to 'Wed" His Dead Love."

REA IN THE HOUSE

I usually don't do this but fuck it. David L., my friend, colleague and former housemate and his wife Anna just had their first child: Rea Jadyn L..

7lbs! 19 inches!

And a Pisces to boot (I love 'em but they're mad emotional).

Babies everywhere!

THE WRITE STUFF

f--- an oreo

Damn, Jessica Hopper is killing me with all these banned words. Her latest list?

*"is proof that"
+"proves that"
-auspicious
+++Like _______ on acid
garnering attention
*+most notably
throws down the gauntlet
+atmospherics
____ bliss
-lilting
sonic nightmare
*++sonic equivalent of
*+bombastic combination
*+classic combination of
*pastiche
-vividly etched
hearkens
to surprinsing effect
+avoids the trappings
*+surprisingly ( WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME ANYTHING ON A RECORD TOUCHED OFF GENUINE SURPRISE?)
+Stuff I absolutely agree with.
-Stuff that I don't.
*Stuff I've written in a music review.

I'm secretly worried that Jessica's been reading my past work as a template of what NOT to write.

Meanwhile, Julianne Shepherd drops her own rules of wisdom:

"If you're a man, and you intend to court a woman, here is a list of things you must never do:
* tell her she dances like she is in the '90s, and expect her to believe you are not dissing her (unless you specify "'90s Fly Girl... you know, like Rosie Perez")
* tell her you don't understand why people like Justin Timberlake, or attribute it to irony
* embrace her as if you've been dating for 2 years, rather than having a first date--boundaries, people!

And here's my personal favorite: "Unreciprocated saddling of your woman with your emo probs is the new "bitch get in the kitchen and make me a pot pie." Testify, sister!

Suckas, take notes.

"According to this weekend's New York Times, the Thin Mint, that so-incredible-it-must-have-crack-in-it cookie that Girl Scouts sell, is the third-best selling cookie in the world, even though it has a sales cycle of one month."
(spotted at the blacklist)

Is Urban Outfitters pulling an Abercrombie? Checkout their new "Asian Girl" t-shirt series.
(props to Hua for sending me this)

LISTEN UP

forget loving me, just leave me alone

Here's the goddamn deal: If you're going to be try to be some wanna-be DJ Danger Mouse and come up with some derivative, eye rollingly hip idea like mixing Weezer with Jay-Z, here's one little piece of advice: quantize your beats, b!tch. Listen to their version of "Threat". The guy who put this together admits that, "I am completely clueless when it comes to rap music" and "I am not a DJ" (no, really?) which, if they are excuses, are pretty weak ones at that for not having your vocals on beat. Dude, it's 2004. I know toddlers who can rock Pro Tools and they can at least figure out how to keep something in rhythm, it's really not that hard. Quit wasting our time otherwise.
(spotted at bestweekever)

F'real - Cocaine Blunts has been mad blunted of late. Not only is he killing it with some hellafied-tastic rap MP3s but he's dropping the news knowledge, yaoming? Here's his latest:

"Q-Tip called into british dj Gilles Peterson's show (I guess Funk Flex couldn't pull the exclusive?). Not surprisingly, he announced that the on-and-off Tribe reunion is officially off (this week). Maybe it's for the better, "the love movement" tarnished their legacy enough. But can Jarobi fucking eat or what? Tip's currently signed to Interscope where he will be releasing a new album featuring a super impressive lineup of Ghostface, Common, Andre 3000, D'Angelo and Mary J. Blige plus production from Madlib (who Tip calls "really really really super advanced" ha ha ha...). They debut a new track from those sessions, which has an unexpectedly dope beat, but Tip still sounds kinda corny.

Just as a bonus, they also put me up on this video of Rakim Allah hawking gold teeth. This shit is either really, really funny or really, really sad. Your choice.

AWWW DAMN IN THE HOUSE

runner-up for the Kanye West
look-alike contest

How come I'm always last to learn about cool people I know who have cool blogs? The latest fam member is Audrey aka DJ Awww Damn who doesn't just have one blog, not even two blogs, but is running three, plus a separate, strikingly designed WWW site devoted to her mixtapes and galleries of her photography work. Holy christ, she puts me to shame, she's so off the chain.

Plus, as if she wasn't cool enough on her very own, she's also the younger sis of DJ Lily Tran, who, back in the mid-1990s, was one of the finest DJs to ever grace the Bay Area and an indelible influence on my own craft. Now Awww Damn's inherited the turntables and is taking the beat science into the new milleneum (yo A, you still rockin' my Tascam?)

And just when you thought it couldn't get better, you learn she makes wallets out of hip-hop albums. Hot damn, Ms. Damn!

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD - LORD OF THE RINGS: THE MUSICAL?

Somewhere, out there, Wagner is shaking his fist from the spirit world. And Tolkien is probably having a good chortle. But yeah, they're turning Lord of the Rings into a $12 million musical. According to co-producer Kevin Wallace: ""If Shakespeare can put all England on stage in Henry IV, I am confident that we can put on the whole of Middle Earth and tell the story of the entire trilogy over that time," he said."

KING KONG AIN'T GOT NOTHING ON ME

(courtesy gossiping bitches)

POP LIFE GALLERY




Not that anyone really cares but I was bored today. Here's a collection of the six splash pages that have led off this blog, beginning in the heady days of Nov 2001. In case you haven't seen the new one, here's the new one.

FELINES OF TERROR? ASIAN AMERICAN STUDENTS DE-AFFIRMED? A PERFECT MATCH? ALL THIS...AND MORE

killer kats

Sharon sent this over: "Family flee house to escape cat attack." I don't want to be skeptical about the veracity of this story, but when any cat is named "Cocoa Puff," it's very hard to take the news seriously when it includes lines like this:

"Cocoa Puff seemed calm when they returned a few hours later. But then she "let out a vicious scream and lunged" at Mr Mancini. He said: "It came downstairs with one intention, and that was to harm us."

Uh oh. New data suggests that Asian American students are "less likely to be admitted into the University of California than students from other racial groups with comparable academic qualifications, according to a UC study released yesterday." No explanation has been given for this statistical disparity yet but best believe that there could be real trouble brewing. Frankly, I can't stand the anti-affirmative action stance that many Asian Americans take but as I said in an earlier blog entry, no issue seems to galvanize middle class APIs to action faster than college admissions. No doubt, some Right-wing SOBs will try to spin this into an Asian vs. Black/Latino racial debate.

Speaking of Asian Americans in college: New York University is experiencing a stunning rash of student suicides. The most recent victim was 19 year old Diana Chien, originally from the Bay Area, who jumped from the roof of her boyfriend's 24 story building after a fight. This is the fourth suicide in the last six months at NYU. What's going on over there?

By the way, Hua pointed out that it's a messed up irony that the only press photo they have of Chien is her participating in the long jump. I also pointed out that on the right hand side of the page is a real estate ad for the very tall building at 845 United Nation Plaza.
(spotted at AngryAsianMan.com)

Ok, in lighter news...this story about Ben Affleck pulling a fast one on the media almost makes me like him. Almost.

Affleck's Mystery Woman Was Rolling Stone Hack


The woman linked to Ben Affleck following his split from Jennifer Lopez has been revealed as Rolling Stone journalist Jancee Dunn. Dunn was interviewing the movie star when he decided to show her just what his life is like for the article, and so he suggested they act like lovers for the afternoon. The resulting photographs led to a bidding war in America as publications thought they had pictures of Affleck with his new girlfriend. The couple's day of running from the paparazzi is detailed in the new issue of Rolling Stone.

(from IMDB.com News)

Has anyone seen these two honey dips? According to Match.Com's new "Physical Attraction Test", they represent my ideal looking women. They're not ugly or anything but...

CHECK MY UNIQUELY ENGAGING, GENRE DEFYING SOUNDSCAPE

Our good friend Jessica Hopper aka the tinyluckygenius has come up with a list of words and phrases that should be banned from any and all future writing on music. Damn, if this goes into in effect, I might be in trouble.

breaking the boundries of genre
genre defying
genre defining
decidedly different
defies categorization
auspicious debut
ambitious debut
striking debut
thoughtful debut
willingness to reinvent themselves
distinguished by
a sound that is distinctly their own
unique, but familiar
uniquely
singular voice
engaging
surpassing
cinematic
soaring
sweeping
epic
dynamic
soundscape
musical landscape (also see "traversing of")
musical tapestry
punctuating rhythms
punctuating bombast

Here's a new drinking game: pick up any magazine or go to an online music site and everytime you read one of these words/phrases, pound a shot. Most of you could be dead by alcohol poisoning within about half an hour.

This story is already starting to make the blog rounds, but Talib Kweli is mad that someone uploaded an early version of his album to the internet. I won't properly do it justice so read the story over at hiphopmusic.com. However, dude over at Cocaine Blunts had this to say about Kweli:

"I won't buy Talib's album. Not because I downloaded it, but because he doesn't know how to ride a beat and sounds like a little girl. Not to mention his hypocritical, ever conflicting politics. Is he trying to get gangsta with that "I will find you" shtick? I have no idea who this Iamrickjamesbitch character is (although he clearly has a penchant for terrible screen names), but I bet he'd shut down Kweli's 3'6", 85lbs frame. Is this gonna be Jay/Steve Stoute 2003? Or is it just gonna be Vordul/Will High pt. 2? I do have to say, the world we live in is a wonderful place where artists can dis you back after they catch feelings."

Ha, tell me about it.

George Michael retires from music industry? Wait, I didn't realize he was still in it. Did I miss something?

Finally, the new all-liberal talk radio network is set to debut on March 31st. Al Franken stand up! All the conservatives be quiet.

This is kind of funny but in the latest William Hung news, he's told our good friend Jeff Chang and his family to stop selling Hung-related t-shirts. Damn Jeff - caught, can you get a witness?

AngryAsianMan.Com (and no, that's not me, contrary to popular perception. And no, that's not Jeff either) reports that there's a new Fast and the Furious sequel in the mix, this time bringing back Vin Diesel. Ha - dude's last three films all flopped, no wonder he's back, presumably no longer asking for $20,000,000. Also, just because it's so vogue to get up on the Tokyo dillsnik, they're shooting it there. Woo hoo, more Japanese stereotypes galore, I can't wait! Another new drinking game - when this film comes out, drink a shot everytime you see any of the following on screen: 1) a Yakuza gangster, 2) a woman in a provocative school girl outfit, 3) shot of Shibuya at night, 4) motorcycle gangs, 5) the interior of an arcade. Blood alcohol poisoning death within 15 minutes this time.

Hua sent this over: The Reel Ghostbusters. Who knew Asians were so superstitious?

FROM ALL ANGLES
UPDATED 3/10

(via Eclecticism)

Do you hate dubbed films? Join theWeb Alliance for the Respectful Treatment of Asian Cinema.
(spotted at Sharon's Yello Kitty)

This should surprise no one: "Teen abstinence vows get so-so results. Pledge doesn't cut rate of disease, study says." On the upside, such vows delays sex about about 1.5 years for most people who make them and I don't think that's a bad idea BUT one of the main justifications for such abstinence programs is that they're supposed to prevent the spread of venereal disease and according to this study, that's not happening. Maybe one day all these fervant sex-phobic religious groups and politicans will finally realize that telling kids not to have sex isn't a way to keep them safer and what's even more noteworthy: 88% of them still had sex before marriage. Oops, so much for the worth of the vow.

Why is anyone afraid of the Illuminati? Apparently, the Masons aren't all that bright.

---

Spalding Gray is dead. After he went missing for over a month, they have identified his body.

Ah, rap haters. They're such a surly bunch. If you want to read some stuff for kicks and giggles, look at this poorly penned invective against hip-hop by the UK's Nick Crowe. Whatever mane!
(spotted at Different Kitchen)

But for those who hate sexist rap, there is now an alternative. Boston debuts an anti-sexist radio station for hip-hop fans.

The Shield is bizzack. Read Jeff Chang's spiel of love about it.

Did you ever want to know the real deal with hip-hop and porn? Ok, even if you didn't, Jay Smooth breaks it down.

Here's a decent article about Asian American rappers. It covers familiar ground that people have been writing about for about 10 years now but hey, any exposure is good exposure right?
(spotted at Hip Hop Blog)

Ladies and gentleman, I give you: Ghettofabulous.com. Hold ya heads.
(spotted at Hip Hop Intellectual Commentary)

---

Oh my. Oh my my. Um...I can't even really describe this in polite company but this new invention might convert new waves of biking enthusiasts.
(spotted at Gizmodo)

I never, ever thought I'd be on the side of Howard Stern, whose shows I find to be appallingly misogynistic and patently offensive but damn, the current Right regime is making for strange bedfellows.
(spotted at Best Week Ever)

Yo, Best Week Ever also reports that Peter Jackson has agreed to film "The Hobbit"!!! No studio chosen yet but you can bet the bidding war over this will be insane.

The Freelance Mentalists are about to crash your cipher. Scott Seward. Jeanne Fury. Julianne Shepherd. Michaelangelo Matos. H Arefe-Aine. Anthony Miccio. Adam Levine. Steve Kiviat. Gustavo Arellano. Matt Cibula. Maybe me. Got a crew? You better tell 'em.

Photoshop junkies can get their hit at Worth1000.com. Some hilarious but visually impressive ideas here.

Check out the new video for Kanye West's "All Falls Down". I'm still sorry he couldn't get the Lauryn sample cleared - that OG version was far better.
(spotted at Intellectual Hip Hop Commentary)

More Arthur Russell love: Here's Johnny Ray Houston's piece on him.

Holy mother of god. Some German(?) folks, with clearly waaaay too much time on their hands, decided to get together and make an animated version of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video (the long version) using charactesr made from Legos. Frightening.

-Speaking of too much time on one's hands...may I also offer the Accidental Video Game Porn Archive? What is extraordinary about this archive is not the fact that there are video games out there with scenes that look like porn but that someone sat down and cataloged it. I mean, jesus christ dudes, get out of Evans Hall sometime and see the light! (Of course, they'd be from Berkeley).

(both spotted at catchdubs.com)

O-DUB IN THE CLUB - WED, MARCH 17

To my Bay Area crew!

Goddamn it's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you, without a dope mix to step to. Yeah, that's right, I'm returning to Milk next week.

Wednesday, March 17: Red 5 Presents... $5

This is part of a new Wed. night series that Red 5 is sponsoring at Milk. It kicked off this week with J. Boogie's Dubtronic Science and on the 17th, it's yet another Wax Poetics Issue Release Party. The last one was off the chain - that was that gig I mentioned at top - and this new one promises to be hot too. We can't mention who the special guest DJ is right now, except to say that this soul brother is number one in my book. I mean, for Pete's sake, this kid can rock. Yaoming?

WILLIAM HUNG JUMP-OFF IS BACK

bigger than the Beatles? Ok, maybe not.

I'm just going to say this once: f--- all ya'll haters, trying to slow the roll of my man William Hung. I hear some of you jealous losers, trying to salt dude's game but it's all just chit-chatter. I thought I told you that he won't stop.

My students at Cal tell me he's kind of gone diva - soaking up the attention, ignoring folks - and hey, that kind of sucks but when he was on the American Idol bonus show on Monday night, he seemed just as earnest as ever. Ok, maybe the attention has gotten to him but he still handles himself on the really real, you feel me? I mean, it's not an act - he may be a little deluded in thinking he has a singing career but if he's being disingenous, I'll be damned.

Speaking of Idol, this week was kind of wack compared to last, but I'm pulling for Jasmine Trias. Yeah, ethnocentric love and what not but honey could sing. She's no Latoya but hey, who is in this competition right now?

PACHINKO! THE SEQUEL

How can I even try to post up something about the Oscars when Jay Smooth already did it better with his Oscar Haikus. This said, I do have a couple of comments not yet said by Mr. Smooth:

-Memo to Liv Tyler: either keep the glasses off or on but make up your mind!
-Sandra Bullock's dress looked like it had a second-stage booster rocket of ruffles attached. Bad look Bullock, for real.
-Look, I really loved Return of the King but for Best Song too? Jesus, c'mon! Then again, is Annie Lennox not looking good or what?
-Is Uma starring in some upcoming Russian swashbuckling film? Her dress seemed to indicate so. Sharon called it "a clump of kleenex."
-Even in a tux, Peter Jackson looks totally schlubby. God bless him.
-I love Susan Sarandon but honey really needed to get her strap up.
-,b>Sophia Coppola shouts out Wong Kar-Wai. That royalty check better be getting to Hong Kong soon honey.
-Adrian Brody's breath spray? Hot shit.
-With Charlize Theron's win, that's the second African American woman to win Best Actress in the last two years.
-Sean Penn used to be married to Madonna. The mind reels.
-Is it me or does the now gaunt Steven Spielberg look exactly like how when South Park lampooned him?

"Kidnapped by White Christians"? A Chinese American couple goes to court to reclaim custody of their daughter from the white couple who agreed to adopt her "temporarily." Whoa - this looks to get UGLY. Just to drop a quick editorial note: I'm not inherently against trans-racial adoptions but I am fucking sick of self-righteous White parents who drone on about "well, what kind of life would they have had in [insert your developing Asian nation here]" like they're untouchable saints. Get over yourselves, seriously. You might be giving your adopted Chinese/Korean/Vietnamese, etc. child a better home in terms of class and comfort but wait until their 19, taking Asian American Studies classes and trying to figure out who the hell they are. Then I'll probably end up with them. Great.

Also, as someone in academia, it never fails to stun me how incredibly stupid, but candid, university officials can be. Right now, I'm sure the Dean of Admissions at Claremont McKenna is trying to wedge his foot out of his mouth after saying:

"I would suggest it just might be true that Asian and Asian-American students are sometimes more involved in solitary activities than Latino students or white students... it's more likely that an African-American student did not play the violin but maybe got involved in an athletic team, got involved in debate, got involved in student government, did things that we, in our value system at CMC, perceive to be a more CMCish fit. Leadership, group-oriented extracurricular activities that we feel are perhaps more in-line with our mission."

I predict that the following may happen: 1) Asian American students will instantly protest Richard Vos (the dean) and believe me, my sister went to a Claremont school and they don't fucking play. 2) Asian parents who spend $20,000/year to send their children to the CMC schools are going to raise a ruckus that will make the Endowment Office turn even whiter with fear. 3) Dean Vos might end up being just Mr. Vos...or how about just Dick...before this whole thing pans out.

If Vos were dean of anything BUT admissions, he'd stand a better chance of keeping his job but if potential Asian American applicants think Vos is out to deny them entry into the CMC system, shit is going to go nuclear faster than India and Pakistan. I'm not necessarily condoning the entitlement that certain Asian Americans feel towards college enrollment (like the fact that many of "us" don't support affirmative action) but however you feel, if there's one thing that Asian Americans have shown themselves politically capable of, it's going on the rampage if there's a perception of educational discrimination.
(both spotted at angryasianman.com)

Let the banning begin! Rockstar announces Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. Bummer - we were all hoping for a Las Vegas-type adventure but this sounds like a Cali cruise. No word yet on if Snoop Dogg does a cameo.

On his blog, Joshua Clover aka Jane Dark comments on the nature of blogging. His insights include this thought that gave me pause: "Available anonymity and the lack of editing make the blog a playground for passing and particular intensities, not to mention enduring and grand ones. I am always looking for writing with local intensity. In return, I suffer through (and perhaps create) a portion of superego-free, solipsistic onanism, and micro-grievances disguised as thinking. That's the trade, and it's not just a fair one, but a bargain."

I just discovered 1115.org through Catchdubs.com and was laughing hilariously at their list of things that God might have been telling Gov. Mike Huckabee when he pretended to take a phone call from the Almighty during a gathering of Republican governors the other week.

For real, is Jazzbo sipping on the syzurp or what?

Oh snap! Sheep Beats. Bring out your inner Neptune.
(spotted at to here knows when)

This is just too rich: "Hotel heiress Paris Hilton embarrassed herself spectacularly on Saturday when she gatecrashed a pre-Oscar bash and fell into a pool. The reality TV star waltzed into the Lord Of The Rings pre-Academy Awards dinner at New Line Cinema boss Bob Shaye's hilltop estate in Beverly Hills, California."
(spotted at IMBD.com)